Father, Forgive Me
by BarettaVendetta
Summary: Hinata falls for a member of her division while the Five Nations are at war. Struggling with her own feelings, she decides to come clean to Hiashi - who is MIA - in a letter.


**Father, Forgive Me**

Father, forgive me.

I have fallen in love. And it's not Naruto, as I thought it would be. It's a woman, from another village, an outsider. From Kumogakure, no less.

I know you will be angry with me. I know we Hyuuga are expected to go down the conventional route and marry each other, to preserve the bloodline. I know you've been looking for potential husbands for me when I'm older. But I can't lie to you, Father.

It all started at the beginning of the war, when the Kages had us split into different divisions. Neji and I were placed in the Second Division, while Kiba and Shino were both in the Fifth. For so long I've trained and fought and gone on missions besides the two of them, and without Shino's stoicism and calmness and Kiba fooling around and trying to calm me down, I felt lost, although having Neji around was some consolation, at least.

Then I met her.

She was almost like a negative of me. Red hair to my black hair, dark skin to my pale skin, taller and thinner than me, and so beautiful. She heard me worrying about the war, laughed and told me it would be a piece of cake, and squeezed my hand. She introduced herself to me. "I'm Karui. I'm from Kumogakure. You?"

A cold fist contracted in my stomach. Kumogakure. The village who kidnapped me when I was a child. The village for whom Uncle Hizashi died. Neji didn't react. And, I thought, this woman might not have had anything to do with my kidnapping, and anyway, it doesn't matter now. We're all

"Hinata Hyuuga," I said. "I'm from Konoha. This is Neji, my cousin." I paused, then added, "This is the first time I've ever fought in a war."

"Hey, me too," she said. "It's probably the same for most of us. But don't worry. Whoever we're up against, we'll kick their arses. We're five nations. What are they?"

I guess she was right. We did beat them, but at a heavy price. The Second Division found ourselves surrounded by a horde of strange white plantmen, and although we did our best to fight them off, they kept on coming in waves. Karui and I found ourselves back to back, her with her katana, me with my Byakugan and my _Jyuuken_. You would have been proud of me, Father. I managed to execute a _Kaiten_. All that extra training I did paid off!

But then, just as we thought the horde was starting to thin out, the shinobi summoned by Edo Tensei came. Uncle Hizashi, Karui's old sensei – a woman who'd been the Jinchuriki for the two-tailed cat – and a strange man from. Neji and I fought Uncle Hizashi...I can't write anymore about it, Father. It hurts too much. All I can say is that I am glad you weren't there. The last thing I can remember of the battle is hearing Neji screaming. Then nothing.

The next time I saw her, we were in the hospital set up by Shizune and the Medical Division. I was covered in marks where the reanimated corpse of Uncle Hizashi had cut off my chakra, and Karui had been slashed and mauled, but we were both still alive – well, of course, otherwise I wouldn't be writing this letter. Stupid girl. We clung to each other, relieved to see a familiar face.

"I'm so glad you're OK," she whispered in my ear. "I was worried about you. You seemed so scared."

"But I...I'm not from your village," I offered.

"So what?" she said sternly. "Does it really matter, Hinata? We're allies. We're fighting for the same cause."

I buried my head in her chest. Words failed me.

News filtered through. Neji ran off to find Lee and comfort him after finding out that Gai had died in battle, opening all eight gates in one last desperate attempt. I watched Chouji bury his head in Shikamaru's shoulder and cry at the news that his father Chouza had been killed while protecting others from an explosive attack. I saw Sakura walking around like a ghost, with haunted eyes, carrying out her medical duties and forcing herself to stay calm while members of the Third Division collapsed and died around her. I heard Temari and Gaara talking about the preparations for Kankuro's funeral, after he had been caught in an ambush by a vengeful Akatsuki. Naruto had been found, much to my relief, but he had escaped the enemy, and rumour had it that he was the one who had finally defeated the man claiming to be Madara Uchiha. Tsunade-sama, Kakashi Hatake, and thousands of others were still missing in action. And no news of you or Hanabi came.

Karui and I lay together in our makeshift bed, surrounded by ninja from the Five Nations, some dying, some already dead, some injured badly but still alive. We talked and talked, about the war, about our families, everything. I felt I'd known her for ages. She'd lost both her sensei to Akatsuki. I didn't want to tell her about what happened to me when I was a kid, though. Why bring it up? Maybe, if I still see her after the war, I'll tell her. But who knows what the future will bring?

Father, I know you will think what I am doing is wrong. I'm still trying to get my head round it myself. All the teachings and values I was brought up with, that the only true form of love is between man and woman, like Izanami and Izanagi, and any other kind of love is immoral and false. That I should stick to my own kind to preserve the Byakugan. I know you were always disappointed in me, and even if I tell you how many plantmen I killed, how I was able to hold off Uncle Hizashi for so long and protected other shinobi from him, how Neji and I – after all these years of hating and fearing each other – fought side by side to defend the Five Nations and everything they value, I know you will still be disappointed, because once again, I could not be the daughter you wanted me to be.

But she makes me feel safe and protected, and her warmth and courage and laughing in the face of danger made me feel strong. Just like Naruto did all those years ago. I have him to thank, and her too. Maybe this is just a phase, and maybe I do love Naruto after all. But for now, I have Karui. We will help each other through this war. We are sisters in arms. We are allies. And we're starting to become lovers too.

I don't know where you are. I don't even know if this letter will ever reach you.

I only know that I love her.

Father, forgive me.


End file.
